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the woman's um

June 3rd, 2008 at 03:31 am

Last Friday I had a meeting with my supervisor, another woman. We both noticed at the same time how often women say, "I'm sorry" and use it as an um or an er.

I started with, "I'm sorry that I had a different spreadsheet than yours."
She countered with, "Let me get my copy, I'm sorry I have to turn around to fetch it from my computer."

And then we got a bit silly:
"Gosh I'm sorry that you're sorry. Sorry."
"Sorry. sorry."

Of course we were smiling and laughing while we were saying it, but one just has to think that the phrase "I'm sorry" has got to cost us women plenty of money. I mean, how effective can you be to drive a hard bargain if you are saying "I'm sorry" all the time? Waddya sorry about? The seller wants you to buy something, no sorry about it. Why be apologetic? Unless, of course, you're trying to spread counterfeit bills around, most people are glad to see you.

Posted in Emotional baggage | 2 Comments »

2 Responses to “the woman's um”

  1. threebeansalad Says:
    June 3rd, 2008 at 03:48 am 1212464904
    1212464904

    Agreed! I work with a bright, hard working 25 yo female who is constantly apologizing. I want to tell her to stop, but can't quite find a tactful, kind way to bring it up. I used to be like that, but a few years ago I decided to try to be more conscious about the use of "I'm sorry" and use it only when necessary and when I'm sincerely sorry.

  2. retire@50 Says:
    June 3rd, 2008 at 07:45 pm 1212522353
    1212522353

    My 17 year old niece constantly says this also and I always try to point it out by saying why are you sorry? what did you do to be sorry about. I hope to break her of the habit before she makes it out to the 'real' world. Smile

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